Let me begin with saying how incredibly blessed and grateful I am for the wonderful people in my life.
It’s official I taught my first yoga class. I knew it wouldn’t be perfect after all it would be my first full 60 minute class on my own and I hadn’t really been able to have a personal practice due to my stress fracture. Which by the way, I refused to believe that’s what was wrong with me. Especially after being misdiagnosed by an orthopedic surgeon who specialized in the foot and ankle. Seriously, his diagnosis was that I had weak ankles.. my reaction was WTF I’m a yogi runner!! I have strong feet or at least strong ankles and my ankle doesn’t hurt!! The top of my foot hurts!! All I have to say about that is thank God for my sister for her guidance in getting me fixed up. I’m happy to report that I’m finally boot free. It’s still difficult not running (doctors orders) but I plan on going for a few runs this week. I’m ecstatic to report that I finally was able to attend a few yoga classes this past week. With that said here’s my tale:
My first class!! 2/21/15
I was a nervous wreck. I was sweating like crazy!! I keep going over what was to be a perfectly scripted class. As a yogi I strive to keep a balance in life, I try not to get worked up. When I’m on my mat it’s my time let go of what doesn’t serve me. Running is also my outlet. It helps me work out my doubts, it gives me time to think things through. I also get my best ideas while running. The two together keep me from losing my mind. Not having either one of these outlets had me on pins and needles. I felt like I was losing my mind. I had my doubts about my class. Was I gonna be horrible, was anyone going to attend, was I going to screw up? I had thoughts of why was I doing this, why was I putting added stress on myself. I finally had to come to reality. The reality was that I was teaching a class and I had to be the best me in that moment. Regardless of what the turnout it wasn’t a life or death situation.
My goodness!! That was the longest hour of my day. It turned out to be a very rewarding, humbling and learning experience. So many of my friends showed up to support me. They offered their love. I was honored that they took time out of their day to share this time and space with me. So as class began we set out on our journey many of them were attending their first yoga class. Talk about pressure!! My class theme was about love. Loving yourself or the love you give or accept from others. I was definitely feeling the love and energy in the room.
So we survived the hour!! Did I screw up? Yes! Did I puke? No! Did I learn from this journey? ABSOLUTELY!! I learned it’s not easy but anything worthwhile is never easy. I learned that I am courageous. I learned I love learning, I will forever be a student, life is about growing. We truly never master anything without the desire to continue to educate and teach ourselves. I also learned I love sharing my love for life.
So from the bottom of my heart I thank all those who attended my first class. The love and light in me bows to and honors the love and light in you. Namaste
Let me begin with saying how grateful I am for the amount of support I have received from my family and friends. Every well wish and positive energy you sent my way didn’t go unnoticed. It’s times like this that you discover how compassionate some of the people in your life truly are. To my husband and kids, thank you for taking care of me. You made sure I was comfortable and didn’t go hungry. You hung out in bed watching tv with me and sometimes watching me sleep, you offered encouragement and so much love with your kind words and your sweet and tender smiles, hugs and kisses. You made me laugh a nd kept me entertained. I love you guys so much. To Kip, your heart is so full of love, I’ve never met a more giving person. You racked your brain seeking a way to put me back together and for that I’m forever grateful, your gift of healing others is beyond imaginable. Thank you my dear friend! To my sister, your guidance and advice has been spot on. I’ve know what issues I was going to be dealing with each step along this journey. I had hoped to prove you wrong but as usual your knowledge and unfortunate experiences dealing with stress fractures was accurate. Thank you so much for your daily texts and phone calls. Love you forever my best friend.
I’m happy to report that I’m finally out of the boot. I’m officially on the road to recovery. For all of you who have had the not so pleasurable experience of a stress fracture and/or needing the boot to heal I’m sure that you will agree with me the real work begins when it comes off. Luckily my sister and I discussed some of the issues that may arise. Kip had also given me several exercises to work on. I had also asked a few of my running and non-running friends what they experienced. I knew I wouldn’t be able to pick up where I left off but somewhere in my mind I thought I might be one of the lucky ones who escaped with nothing more than a tender and sore foot. Nope, no such luck!! Where I had the fracture is tender and sore which I expected but I didn’t really think I’d be dealing with shin splints, the beginning signs of plantar fasciitis and knotted and tight calves. Wasn’t I suppose to feel better now that the boot was off? What in the world was happening!! Why was I dealing with symptoms that didn’t exist prior to my injury…but enough about that, my blog isn’t about my injury or my recovery.
My story is about all the joy and happiness I’m surrounded by. I started practicing yoga at home and I’m feeling strong and refreshed. I’m scheduled to teach yoga classes beginning in 2 weeks. I’m completely excited and nervous as I embark on this new quest in my life. It will be challenging but my mantra as of lately has been “if it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you.” The other joyful thing in my life is that I was able to go out for a run this past Thursday. It wasn’t easy but I had to test it out. I went out for a 2 mile run to see where I was physically. We were registered to run the Hot Chocolate 15K (9.3 miles) on Saturday. I had already made the wise decision to change from the 15K to the 5K (3.1 miles). I was really happy that I was going to actually run. I set 2 goals, first was to enjoy the run and the second was to attempt to keep an 11min. pace. I somehow managed to meet and surpass my time goal which was icing on top!! When it felt tough I chanted my mantra to myself. My heart is happy and I’m humbled at how resilient we are. I still plan on taking it one day at a time and enjoy every second of everyday.
So with an open heart and an open mind.
Sorry for the delay in posting a new blog. I guess I’m having bloggers block. As you all know when we hit the ground running with our blog I was healthy. I was running and preparing for the Dopey Challenge in Disney World. I had just completed my yoga teacher training and then BOOM, out of nowhere I end up with a stress fracture. On a bright note, I’m healing!! Yes it’s been a slow process but it’s progress in the right direction.
Once I returned home from Disney World all I wanted to do was sleep and that is exactly what I did!!! Rest, rest and more rest. I literally would go to work, crawl in bed the second I got home from work and sleep, then eat, then back to sleep and repeat. This went on for 2 weeks. I felt like Jenny from the movie Forest Gump!! It was like I hadn’t slept in years. I went from being an early riser to not wanting to get out of bed at all. This is so not me. I always have 50 things I need to do or want to do but my body wasn’t having of that nonsense. I’m glad to report that I finally feel rested. I am nowhere near running at this point but thanks to Kip, my sports therapist, I have been able to walk out of my boot for an hour or so per day. It isn’t pain free but it’s manageable pain. His advice: “your will has to be greater than your thoughts.” Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. So everyday after work I’ve been taking baby steps without the aid of my boot. I’m ready to give the boot a boot but per doc’s orders I need to remain in the boot until my next visit. February 4th needs to get here already!! So until then I will take it one day and one step at a time.
Thanks for all your continued love and support.
With love and gratitude, Namaste
Stress fracture. These 2 words can cause a runner’s spine to tingle. Most of us have either had a stress fracture or know someone who has had a stress fracture. The most common place for stress fractures are the foot. The most common site is the second and third metatarsal bones. Other sites include the heel, the navicular bone (top of the midfoot), and the fibula (outer bone of lower leg). The most common cause of stress fractures are overuse, weakening of the bones also known as osteoporosis, poor foot wear, and the female athletic triad to name a few. There are other causes but these are common risks for women.
This is my third stress fracture in the past year. Each fracture has been in a different place. Both of my feet have been injured. I have thought about my recent stress fractures at length. I know the pain started at mile 25 of the marathon. I have reviewed that final mile over and over in my head. Did I step wrong? Did something happen earlier in the race. Was my foot already broken and I made it worse? I keep a running journal and I don’t make any reference to the site where my fracture has occurred. I talk about my toe hurting and the plantar fasciitis at length. A common cause of a stress fracture other than overuse is change of gait. Did I change my gait without realizing it? I don’t think so. I believe the cause of my recurrent stress fracture is bone loss. I asked a fellow colleague who is an orthopedic surgeon to review my x-ray. He told me matter of factly that I have bone loss. We discussed my mileage and activity and he did not feel it was excessive. We discussed the recommendation for running.
So what is the female athletic triad? The female athletic triad is a combination of energy deficiency with or without eating disorder (poor nutrition), infrequent or absent menstrual cycle, and bone loss. When I think about this model, I always think of the high school distance runner. She is young, thin, and active. What I failed to think about was, how do I fit this model. I fit all three of these categories.
1. I am an older runner who fertility days are far behind me and therefore have absent menstrual cycles. Ok let me just say it. I am in Menopause. It is so hard to say that one word. It makes me feel old. I therefore have estrogen deficiency due to this. Decreased estrogen can lead to bone loss.
2. I don’t have an eating disorder but I am always on a diet. I am always trying to lose that last 10 pounds. My diet is quite poor and that’s why I’m always on a diet. My favorite meal is hamburger and french fries. Calcium is not in my diet. Maybe once a week if I treat myself to ice cream. Hence poor nutrition.
3. Osteoporosis or thinning of the bones is a risk for stress fractures. Risk factors include age, menopause, female, low body weight, and smoking. Bones need both calcium and Vitamin D to help prevent osteoporosis. I slather sunblock on my body when I run. Bones need both calcium and vitamin D. Vitamin D is produced by the body in response to the skin’s exposure to sunlight. It helps the body use calcium. Sunblock limits the absorption necessary.
So now every morning I take my calcium supplement. I am scheduled for a bone density test. I know I am not 21 and my training has to change. I know I have to incorporate cross training. I have always known this but have not been compliant. I love to run it’s what I do. The bike to me is tedious. I often tell people I would rather run 20 miles on the treadmill than bike for 1 min. Swimming doesn’t let me listen to my music. I really enjoy listening music. Every song on the radio has the potential to make it to my running playlist. Weights are just a punishment. They say old dogs can’t learn new tricks. Well I am going to attempt to change. This year I will share my journey of this change. I may not like it but if I want to continue to run then it’s what I will do.